Everybody wants to have great sex, but what does great sex mean? I think the most important thing when it comes to a genuinely satisfying sex life is that both parties are happy with the outcome. Yeah, it means paying attention to your partner’s needs and desires in different ways. Taking note of the way they breathe, the levels of their excitement and arousal, what they say during sex, but also before or afterward… Good sex is more than just staying hard for a longer amount of time or having a big cock. Since even the best of you need a few pointers from time to time, I decided to write an article about the best sex tips for men.
From kissing more often to trying new sex toys, here you will be able to find advice, tips, and tricks for more satisfying and exciting sex life.
17 Sex Tips For Men
Want to surprise your lady with something new? Did you think of buying her flowers, something to wear, jewelry, a book from her favorite author? Why not surprise her with a few novelties in the bedroom? I bet that’ll surely get her juices flowing!
Let’s take a look at what’s on the plate today, shall we?
1. Utilize the Magic of Foreplay
I have one question for you here – why hurry? Why skip to intercourse right away when you can enjoy each other some more?
There’s a reason why foreplay exists. It’s there to make you both as horny as possible, to build anticipation, or to be a purely enjoyable act in itself, regardless of whether you have intercourse afterward or not.
Not to mention it’s also a great way to find out what both of you like to do in bed. And, also, what you don’t like doing. All of this will help you gain a better knowledge of your partner in terms of their sexual desire and preferences.
Besides, foreplay can also be a playground where you get to pleasure each other and have an orgasm. For example, you can try mutual masturbation as a form of foreplay. You can choose to come or just use it as a warm-up.
Foreplay offers plenty of ways you can tease your partner into wanting more. Whether it’s dry humping, breast play, dirty talk, watching porn together, biting each other… Use it!
2. Masturbate Before Having Sex
Okay, this isn’t for everybody, obviously. But I would definitely recommend this to men who have trouble with premature ejaculation (PE).
Getting off an hour, thirty minutes or so before sex can help you curb your PE and help you last longer during intercourse. This is because after you have an orgasm, you experience what’s called a ‘refractory period’, a period in which it’s really hard to orgasm again because the body needs some time to get its act together.
I know this will be harder to do if you happen to have spontaneous sex. In that case, focus more on foreplay as well as edging (which I’ll also mention here). Also, try changing sexual positions more often, so you can cool off a bit once you notice you’re being very close to having an orgasm.
3. Don’t Be Afraid to Engage in Dirty Talk
Dirty talk may not be for everybody, but if you’re thrilled by the idea, I say give it a shot. As you may already know, sex and sexuality aren’t only about the genitals. It has a lot to do with the brain and imagination too.
Dirty talk gives you just that! The erotic power of imagination and words to verbalize your desires and turn-ons right there during or before sex and foreplay. I mean it’s like you’re doubling the sexual experience in a way!
Now, I know for some people dirty talk can be intimidating because they think they can’t manage the rhetoric. Well, it’s actually simpler than it seems, folks. I have a special article on the topic that’ll help you master the game of dirty talk in no time!
If you’re not sure your partner will be into it, it’s always a good idea to test the waters first. Don’t go full-on kink right on the first try.
You can say stuff like “I am so hard right now” or “That shirt makes me think dirty”, and see how your partner reacts to it. If she’s into it she may continue “the chat” forward. If not, don’t force it and leave it for some other time in the future.
4. Try Sexting
And while we’re on the topic of dirty talk, why not try sexting as well? I mean, foreplay doesn’t need to begin strictly in the bedroom. Sexting allows you to build anticipation without even being in the same room, hours before you get to rip the clothes off each other.
Send her a dirty text during lunch break. Or while you’re traveling on your way home from work. Send her an enticing picture of you in the bedroom while she’s at work. Use your imagination and flirt, flirt, flirt!
That way you get to keep the sexual energy throughout the day. Trust me, by the time she gets home from work, she’ll want to do it all over the house.
You can always use the strategies of dirty talk in sexting as well, so make sure you check out that link I posted in tip #3.
5. Bring Kissing Back Into the Game
Kissing is sexy but also intimate. And that’s a perfect combination for the beginning of foreplay, isn’t it?
Lot’s of couples nowadays (especially long-term couples) have forgotten to kiss. Remember the good old days when you couldn’t stop making out? Why did you stop in the first place?
Kissing isn’t just for fresh, new couples. It’s for everybody! Now I know some people are apprehensive about the way they kiss. But kissing isn’t something that cannot be worked on. It’s also a technique that you can manage with practice.
The key is to find out what kind of kissing your partner wants. But for that, you need to experiment, and you need to openly ask her what she wants!
6. Try Cunnilingus
There’s another thing you can try on your lady with your mouth. Yes, I’m talking about oral sex. It’s quite known by now that women need more than sole penetration to come and/or experience pleasure. And one of the ways you can rock her world is to give her head.
Cunnilingus is the name for when you lick your lady’s vulva for her pleasure. It’s something that a lot of women enjoy, although not all of course. This means only one thing – again, you need to test the waters.
Go down on your lady and see how she reacts to it. But, don’t give up on the first try, because you may only be doing your job wrong. Don’t be afraid to ask for pointers and ask her what feels good. Also, make sure to check out my special article on the topic where I get down to all the nitty-gritty details of cunnilingus!
7. Use CBD-infused lube
That’s right! You can use CBD oil for sex as well!
Have you ever considered using a CBD-infused lube? If you want to give your sexual routine a little extra edge, then you can try Spark, a CBD-infused lube that won’t let you down when you most need it!
8. Use Other Essential Oils
Now, besides CBD oil, there are also other types of essential oils you can use to surprise your partner with some new ideas.
Ever thought of trying essential oils for female stimulation? These can be especially good if your wife or partner needs that extra push to get into the mood.
You can use essential oils to give your lady erotic massages, which can also be a great way to start foreplay.
Also, essential oils can be put in diffusers and help both of you relax, raise the mood, make you more aware, and even enhance your sex drive.
9. Don’t Have Sex Only in the Bedroom
I think this one’s pretty straightforward – change the rooms! Sure, the bedroom might be the comfiest place you could have sex, but to hell with comfort!
Try the living room couch, for a change. Or the kitchen counter. The washing machine in the bathroom? The bathtub itself? Or maybe you can do it in the car, sneaking in an abandoned alley, do it in a friend’s bathroom…
Heck, there are many options out there. You just have to get out of your comfort zone a bit.
10. Try BDSM
BDSM has always been a hot topic when it comes to sex. And it definitely comes with a no small dose of notoriety. But that’s just part of the fun, isn’t it?
Besides, BDSM comes in all shapes and sizes. If you’re intimidated by what you think you know about it, but you’re still even remotely interested, then the first thing you need to do is to get informed.
BDSM is so many things. Even using a blindfold or tying your partner with a scarf or a tie can be considered a form of BDSM. The first is called ‘sensation play’, and the second falls into the category of ‘bondage’.
If you’re ready to try BDSM and are looking for some ideas, then check out my article where I give 7 super exciting BDSM ideas you can try in your own home.
11. Lose Yourself in Sexual Roleplay
And if role play is more up your alley, you can definitely try that as well. Sexual roleplay will allow you to exit your everyday life for a moment and get lost in a fictional character that you either love or loathe. It sparks sexual imagination and gives your sexual routine a little bit more room and ideas to experiment with.
Of course, you can always couple sexual roleplay with BDSM. For many people, this makes one hell of a combo!
12. Squeeze in Quickies Whenever You Can
Sex sometimes takes time, and nowadays, we seem to have less and less of it. So how are we to make more time for sex if we don’t have time in the first place?!
The answer, my friends, is quickies. I’m sure you’ve heard the term before. Quickies are those really short intervals where you get to have (hot) sex and then continue going about your day. Quickies won’t leave you much time for cuddles, but you can leave that for the evening.
What they will give you is much-needed orgasms and relief during the day. Consider including quickies in the mornings, before you go to work, let’s say when you get into the shower. Invite your wife in and allow yourself some short, but hot sexy time before the day begins.
You can also do it during a work break. If you’re really in the mood for days, but you cannot seem to find the time, consider timing each other’s work breaks to be more or less at the same time. Meet up where convenient and have a go! Trust me, it’ll make the rest of the boring workday much more bearable for the both of you.
Plus, you get to be creative with new sex positions that’ll help you squeeze the best out of sex in the shortest amount of time!
13. Try Out Some New Toys
Have you ever considered using toys during sex or foreplay? If not, this is the time! It’s unfortunate that a lot of guys get intimidated by toys, thinking they’ll somehow replace them. This is not the case at all, my friends.
On the contrary. Toys can be your new best friend in the bedroom. Look at them as a sex wingman!
If you want to surprise your lady and give her a new type of sexual pleasure, then I definitely suggest getting some toys. And guys, there are a lot of options out there, so don’t worry about running out of ideas.
Like, for example, you can get her a vibrator, and tease her with it during foreplay. Or, get that magic vibrating wand everybody’s been talking about lately. You can also get a suction toy that mimics cunnilingus and use it while you kiss or stroke her breasts. And don’t worry, it won’t replace your amazing cunnilingus skills! After all, it’s still a different experience when a toy, and when a person does it.
14. Try Edging
You may have heard about edging before. And if you haven’t, let me put it succinctly: it’s a practice of delaying orgasms for the purpose of enhanced sexual pleasure once you orgasm. That’s right – edging is supposed to make your orgasms stronger and longer-lasting. But, you know, you have to postpone a couple of them first in order to reach that effect in the end.
Edging is recommended for various types of sexual dysfunction, including premature ejaculation, as well as sexual performance anxiety.
And it’s actually pretty easy to do. You can practice by yourself, with your partner, with or without sex toys… The choice is yours. All you have to do is stop stimulation once you notice you or your partner are nearing orgasm. You can change the sex position, start doing something else entirely (like oral sex, for example), switch to foreplay, or make a brief pause.
If your partner hasn’t tried it before, I’m sure this will be the next favorite thing in your sex life!
15. Play With Her Breasts
Breasts are one of the most potent erogenous zones on a woman’s body. At the same time, for a lot of men out there, they are one of the most desired parts of their partner’s body. So why not pay them more attention? Give your partner’s boobs the touch they crave!
The problem is, however, that a lot of men also don’t know how to behave around boobs. So they do stuff that their partner might not necessarily like. What do I mean by this? Well, for example, they squeeze them too much, they bite them too much or don’t bite at all (although their partner might want that). Or, they motorboat them – you know that thing where you bury your face in her boobs, turning your head on all sides and making weird noises?
Sure some women might like all of this, but the key is to ask or try to find out what it is that your partner might particularly like.
See my guide on breast play on how to better your approach to breasts and how to make your partner crave your touch on her precious boobs.
16. Consider Using the Sexy Edginess of Biting
In long-term couples biting probably has the same level of appreciation as does kissing. Couples have simply stopped doing it with time. When was the last time you bit your partner? Made a hickey on her neck, or her thighs, or her boobs, or her stomach?
Yeah, I bet you don’t remember.
Of course, biting and hickeys might not be for everybody, and that’s perfectly fine. But, who knows, maybe your wife or partner will find it super sexy, and she’ll end up enjoying it and wanting more! But you wouldn’t know if you didn’t try it or didn’t ask in the least.
So what you can do is, again, test the terrain. Next time you begin foreplay, kiss her, and then gently bite her lip. See how she reacts. Or go further down and nibble on her neck or her breasts and nipples. You can do this with her thighs, her stomach, her back, almost any body part there is, basically. Monitor her responses in the process, and after you finish having sex ask her how she felt. That way you’ll have a clear pass or fail for next time when you want to continue your game of playful biting.
17. Pay Attention to Her Numerous Erogenous Zones
Sure, you’ve heard about the G-spot by now. You’ve probably even read about how to find it inside the vagina, how to recognize it. But what about the other female erogenous zones?
Turns out there are plenty of them on the female body. The breasts are among the most famous ones, of course. So is the clitoris. But then there are the backs of the knees and the inner parts of the thighs.
There’s also the whole neck area, the head, and the scalp, as well as the ears. And what about the stomach? Many women like to be touched there. It’s a really soft, gentle spot that’s often ticklish, great for soft touches, or a bit of biting and nibbling, and even hickeys.
So don’t be afraid to find more about your wife’s erogenous zones and use their potential for her sexual benefit!
Nobody can have great sex all the time. Okay, maybe a few of you can. But still, the rest of us poor mortals have to deal with certain bad or average days in our sex lives. Sometimes it’s stress, sometimes a bad mood, sometimes it’s just too many family or work obligations… However, it’s all perfectly normal if you’re feeling you’re not at your best once in a while.
What being great in bed actually means is being open to new experiences. It means to dare to experiment, to work on yourself and your techniques regarding both sex and foreplay. Yeah, foreplay is a vital part of a fulfilling sex life, and I think couples should go for it as much as possible.
That said, I hope these 17 sex tips for men will give you that much-needed spark in the bedroom and make the average days in bed a little less average and a lot more special.