There’s nothing wrong with introducing something new to your love life, giving it a bit of an edge, and even a bit of a kink. And what better way to do this than using some of these sexual roleplay ideas I’m about to share?
We all know the usual role-playing ideas, the cliches: the doctor and patient/nurse, the boss and secretary/employee duo, the professor and the student… But sexual roleplay can be about so much more!
There are as many fantasies, professions, identities, and characters as there are people out there. And, the possibilities for playing them out are endless!
Here I’ll focus on a few scenarios that get me going. But if you want to learn more about how to introduce sexual roleplay into your marriage check out my Guide to Sexual Roleplay with Your Wife.
So let’s look at some steamy sexual roleplay ideas to kick-off your bedroom careers!
Scenario #1 – Playing a Sex Worker/Escort or a Gigolo
This is one of the easier sexual roleplay ideas to try out. It’s also one of the sexiest on the list, in my opinion at least.
Plus it gives you tons of options where you can meet and do the deed. You can, for example, rent a hotel room in the city and pretend you seduce each other. Or you can get a room somewhere for the weekend, and also do it while you’re vacationing. In the end, you can just do it in your own bedroom, and it’s still going to be super-hot. It’s not like you’ll be needing any extra equipment (unless you want it, of course).
So, if you get off at hiring a prostitute, you can be the gentleman that is looking for one. Or if you prefer to be the one providing the services, you can be the gigolo in this scenario. It’s up to both you and your partner to figure out the dynamics.
An alternative scenario is to book a room in advance (this can also be your own bedroom). After that, set an appointment with the “sex worker” beforehand.
In any event, you’ll want to dress up, and do a bit of grooming to look sleek and utterly self-confident. You can have a drink at the bar or in your own home. Then put in a request to be paid (before or after the act, depending on your fantasy). If you’re the gigolo, ask your partner what they like to do. If you get really into it, you can even impose some rules. Tell her how you usually do your business and how you tend to please your customers.
A little bit of attention to your attire can go a long way, so don’t be shy about putting on your best. Best suit or your best lingerie, best miniskirt, tall, leather boots for your partner, and the like – it all counts! Confidence is key when it comes to role-playing. Just put out the sexiest self you have hiding in there, let it roam among the streets and the sheets!
Scenario #2 – Playing a Cheating Spouse
Now, I know that just the mere thought of cheating horrifies most people in committed relationships. But here is a chance to turn that around and play with it a little. Get rid of the fear and convert it into a sexy game where no one actually gets hurt and everyone is in on the fun and enjoyment!
Dr. Justin Lehmiller, a scholar that deals with issues regarding sexual fantasies, cites a study on his website that says that 98% of men and 80% of women engage in sexual fantasies about other people, at least at one point of their relationships. But this doesn’t mean that they’ll cheat or that they don’t love or are attracted to their partners. Figuring out why you have a particular fantasy is a complex thing, and you can’t reduce it to basic psychology. Often, the reasons are truly unknown. But what you can do is play around with it.
So, playing a cheating spouse is something you can definitely do without feeling guilty about it.
Here also the opportunities are endless – you can be more naughty or less naughty, it’s up to you.
You can pretend you’re cheating with a stranger, a coworker/colleague, neighbor, her acquaintance – the soccer mom next door… Or, if you want to be extra-kinky, you can pretend you’re cheating her with her best friend or her sister (or she with your best friend and/or your brother). Now, since this is a bit of a tricky terrain, you’ll also need to navigate it extra carefully. You need to focus on the general idea of the fantasy, and not specific (real) people in your lives, if you’re uncomfortable with the idea but still kinda want to try it. So I suggest you imagine them rather than base them on an actual sister/brother or best friend.
Scenario #3 – Playing One of Your Favorite Movie/TV Show/(Comic) Book Characters
Why shouldn’t sexual roleplay ideas include characters from films and books?
Turning into a favorite pop-culture (or classic) character for one night is one of the best ways you can introduce role play into your sexual routine.
Are you a fan of a particular fictional literary or movie character maybe? Such as James Bond for example, or maybe Khal Drogo from the show Game of Thrones? You can be a sleek secret agent or a fantasy warrior king, it’s up to you! Maybe your wife is a fan of Kate Blanchet and Galadriel from Lord of the Rings? Or maybe she’s into darker characters and her fav lady is Lady Macbeth which makes you the ambitious king Macbeth?
Since the field of cultural heroes and anti-heroes is a vast one and gets bigger by the day, you can never run out of fresh ideas!
Scenario #4 – Playing Out Porn Stars
This might just be one of the steamier sexual roleplay ideas on this list.
There’s a reason why porn is so popular – people just love watching other people have sex. PornHub, one of the most famous internet porn video sites, reported 28.5 billion total visits for 2017! Distribute that throughout the days in a month and you get 81 million visits a day!
The voyeurism of it, the “reality” of watching other people get aroused and achieve pleasure, makes your blood boil and your desire goes over the roof! We often tend to see ourselves as the people on the screen, identify with them, share their pleasures and desires, their ecstasy, their joys.
And porn gives you all that in a tight little package of satisfaction. So why not try to actually be those people on the screen – be the handsome stud that can keep it going for half an hour or the screaming hottie that’s wild with pleasure!
You can try and watch porn together, pick out the stuff you like, and then try to do them in the bedroom. If you’ve ever wondered how you look while you’re having sex, you can even put a mirror in the room and try watching yourselves doing the act (it can be really sexy). You can even shoot a video of yourselves having sex if that’s more up your alley, and then re-watch it when you feel like it. Be careful though of where you keep the video if you choose to do this.
Scenario #5 – Playing Out a Profession You’ve Always Wanted to Have But Never Had the Chance
Lots of us have taken professional paths that we never originally thought we’d take. It’s just how life goes. But that’s no reason to give up on them in our fantasies, now, is it?
Even if you need if you work in marketing, and your career has led you to the 9-5 drill every workday, you can still be everything you’ve ever wanted in the privacy of your bedroom. Do you still fantasize about that cabin in the woods from your childhood? Are you building it with your bare hands, like a true lumberjack?!
Well then, don’t be afraid to get your hands dirty! Be the lumberjack you want to be, put on that red plaid shirt beaming with masculin energy! This shirt is practically ordering your wife to be taken off as soon as she lays her eyes on it!
The same goes for any kind of profession or hobby. Just take the best and sexiest aspects of it and use them for character and setting. Trust me, it’s going to work magic for your sex life as well as your overall self-image!
Scenario #6 – Throw in Some BDSM Kink
BDSM is all about the powerful polarity of dominance and submission. Power play works in all domains of life.
BDSM allows for a lot of variety and different degrees of dominance and submission, both in terms of the tools used and in the whole erotic philosophy and ethics of BDSM itself. You can be very dominant in your regular life and be (very) submissive in the bedroom, and vice versa. You can also be, what’s commonly called in the BDSM community – a switch, someone that wants to be both dominant and submissive at different times.
If you’re new to the thing, you can use softer toys and tools for erotic scenarios. You can use blindfolds and scarfs, light spanking, being bossy. You can tell your partner what to do (this can also be a part of more hard-core BDSM), you can try hair pulling, among other stuff.
Whether you want to be submissive or dominant is something you have to figure out for yourself. It depends on personal preferences and what kind of power play gets you going. Talk it out with your partner first and see which aspects of it you want to begin with. And, of course, don’t forget to pick out a safe word!
Scenario #7 – Playing Out a One Night Stand/Meeting a Stranger
Part of the thrill of people fantasizing about their partners having sex with other people is because they get to see them with fresh eyes and get to experience the mystery of them as the strangers they once were.
Well, if you wanna remind yourself and your partner of how it was like for you both at the beginning of your relationship, one of the ways is to play out the “meeting a stranger” fantasy.
You can pick out a bar or a restaurant you haven’t been to before and set up a “chance meeting”, which will, later in the evening, end up with you two having sex. Or you can also do this at home – you can try to act as strangers the whole night, flirting shamelessly and then taking all the action into your bedroom!
Roleplay can be a great way to spice up your love life, no doubt. It gives you the opportunity to be someone else for a change.
Whether it’s for a couple of hours or even for a day, I hope that with these sexual roleplay ideas I’ve managed to put a spark in your sex life.
It’s only by stepping out of yourselves that you’ll actually get a chance to know yourselves a little bit better. So, I suggest you give sexual roleplaying a go as soon as you can!